Ten Things To Do With Your Garage

1. Park a car there - Sometimes the way something is supposed to be used is the way you should use it.  The default value is sometimes the best.  So just stop being a rebel and park your Vespa in the garage, and go to bed.  Now you don't have to worry - you're just like everyone else.  That will help you sleep.
2. Start a cult - Let's face it, alright?  Mainstream and fundamentalist religion zealots are off their proverbial rockers.  Either way does not matter.  Pulpit jockeys throw on a suit and tie before they preach in the limelight.  That is the attire of a business man and the venue of a clown.  The collection plate now accepts paypal and bitcoin.  I know, I know, it was all foretold in their own book.  It is said that it won't end well.  Still, it makes you think, perhaps a doomsday cult is just the thing you need to jumpstart your white vanilla sex life.
3. Build a computer - Take a page from Bill Hewett and Dave Packard.  Use that car space to create a digital revolution.  Out of ideas?  Drop acid and build whatever contraption comes to your spirit mind.  Act like its a normal thing and get ready for millionaire status, which is pretty nice by most accounts.
4. Start a band - Everyone in the house, as well as close neighbors, would enjoy it if you were to blast out some grunge rock, preferably late at night.  Or just practice drums for 12 hours a day.  I can guarantee you that your visitors will not feel uncomfortable if you perform for them.  Practice in the garage but perform in the kitchen, a recipe for assured success followed by the greats such as Alan Shields and the Speedbumps.
5. Manufacture methamphetamine - Meth use has skyrocketed.  It costs 75 cents to cook 1 pound of pure street crank worth ten million dollars in fifteen minutes.  It is a safe and sustainable methodology advocated by some of society's top-notch peeps. It is estimated that each person knows a thousand tweekers.  Do the math recursively.  Also, make an effort to conceal your undertaking.  This is most important when you are talking about law enforcement officers and speaking of their general knowledge of your enterprise or its closest affiliates.
6. Turn it into a Reiche energy factory - These days, Reiche energy prices are through the roof.  All you need is an alternating layer of wood and metal.  So simple, and the next thing you know, you can sell it on the open market.  Throw out that old orgone accumulator and get busy making Reiche the new, cheap way!
7. Nanotechnology - Think molecular reproducers and build a real life replicator, using it to bring apocalyptic doom to the unwitting masses!  Or make crafts for sale on eBay.  No one gonna judge you for it probably.
8. Use the space for hoarding.  Collect junk from everyone and just throw it all around in there willy-nilly.  Do not keep track of any of it.  Stacks as high as the ceiling are in order.  Precarious is the name of the game.  You want the clearing crew you or your descendants eventually going to need to recall the traumatic experience for the rest of their lives.  You want publications that document your collection for commoners to gawk at and feel disconcerted and not right for weeks on end.
9. There are no other ways to use your garage unless you were to turn it into a living space but then it would not count as a garage and therefore would not technically meet the criteria of the list in the first damn place.  
10. Get a job!  Whatever you do in the garage is a waste of time and effort.  It is just a room cheaply made, no flooring, bare and missing a wall, and some lazy worker said, "let's just put a big door there, I don't know why." This obsession with garages has to stop, Fonzi.