The Chronicles of Granny In The Bed

Our recruiters are currently seeking highly-intelligent, highly-motivated, highly-skilled, highly-recommended, and highly-attractive individuals to work under the shittiest conditions for one of the worst salaries and the worst benefits package in the galaxy.     Putting employees first [Company Name] is a family company with headquarters in [City].   Employing over a billion peasants and between 30 and 36 noblemen on 12 planets, in 2,196 countries, our agents speak 62,000 languages in 428,000 dialects.   It is our mission to trek across the universe and sell something that someone else made to someone else, giving an invoice to all parties involved.   We specialize in bullshitting government as well as our customers and clients - but of all the people that we bullshit, rest assured that our employees come first. [Company Name] employees applaud a major decision that will ruin their lives. Qualifications: PhD in Mathematics ...

Vril to hire 10,000 pilots for chemtrail program; President Obama announces White House worked with Boeing to develope chemtrails that are invisible to the eyes.   Phoenix – The Vril Society announced Friday that it is seeking to hire ten thousand pilots in launching its newest push to enslave the world’s population using controversial chemtrails.   The revelation came at a private dinner in a secret location believed to be an alien spaceport.   Potential candidates are urged to submit a resume and cover letter to www.vril.org.eu before January 15.     A local mother points out chemtrails to her shocked family. “We just weren’t using enough gas,” said Green Bishop, a former chairperson of The Rand Corporation during a webinar on ureachforit.org Sunday, “adding pilots is like the best thing we can do.   Think about it.”  Bishop went on to say that each plane will be equipped with tons of Sargon...