Last time we taught you what homeless beggars do with your spare change. The response to that article caused three fires in our server warehouse that are still unaccounted for and continue to be an ongoing struggle against time and space. Some have gathered super-intelligence and have morphed into hyper-beings easily capable of world destruction. Our techies are really earning their scratch this week but prove to be, really, when all things are considered, not capable of doing anything that is not by-the-book. Now we have even more ado before we get on with it.
All of that being said, we still want to cash in on the viral craze. So, we wrote a follow-up article. A follow-up article is a tool used by bloggers to fill in the billowing white clouds in their sprawling editorial calendars. It is a way to bother online readers and run as many frilly and misdirected ads under their tawdry noses before they scoff away to google about hillbilly trivia or how to boil an egg. Yet it remains a fact that not one reader of this online fad has clicked on a single ad or even once tried to harass the authors. Unfettered by this cruel treatment, we must go on with the article. (The SEO gurus are telling me "we are going to get killed in SEO". I said, "What is SEO, again? Any hints? Should I be worried? Who are you?")
It was known to the best sages that failure is the very best thing that can happen to anyone. Despite this, the average person fails, becomes dejected as well as despondent, becomes addicted to fantastic and wonderful substances, and is later heard losing again with better excuses as part of a new narrative of revisionist denial. Their great-great-grandchildren rarely report an endowment handed down from that side of the family. It remains a critical fact that CIA agents are often handpicked from this category.
The worst sort of person, by far, does not even bother failing, but waits for idle fate to wander in with a last-minute plan for their rock-bottom lives. Those unfortunates in this fringe never learned the lessons of fistory and are doomed to be pummeled. Pulpit jockeys often prop this ideology to gain support from the worst dregs. Their failure in life almost redeems their ordained free-float through life, but not quite.
Finally we arrive at the sweet third spot. The alpha famela, best of all intelligent creatures, fails and is indulged by the experience, is taken to spaces not dreamed of, is never at a loss for words when it comes to explaining how wonderful it is to be defeated by life. These sorts often tour the country giving seminars to pot-belly fanny packers wearing their own names who gobble sound-bites as a way to pass the time and are never out of fungible assets to trade for the meaningless experience. They are happy to sit by the pool and watch. This audience is also, conveniently like a faithful congregation, constantly in need of good advice but incapable of retaining the information. Thoughtless ideas go in their mind-sieve and currency, neatly pressed, rolls out the other side.
Failure never fails. I have personally failed throughout my entire life to fail at all, which may be the most, or least, successful of all failure possibilities. Some would disagree, but they are usually not successful at conveying the message because they are usually in prison from being deemed inappropriate for society by a court of law. The failure here can be applauded only by the judge of record, in the jurisdiction as prescribed.
If someone never failed, then how do they know they even succeeded? In failing to realize the situation, perhaps, they are vindicated but it is only a Pyrrhic victory under the auspices of a Parthian shot clumsily concealed behind Venetian blinds. Winter is upon the gowry and Winning Q. Jealously is its full name. "Fail, love it, and get on with your empty life." should be a bumper sticker tattooed on every Chevy or Ford.
Failure is not in a textbook. One cannot learn to fail. One must be a failure and live the life of a failure and be given over to endless faults before one can ever hope to even begin to understand the basic mainspring coiled within the tenets of ineptitude and failure. Indeed, I have failed to make the point and yet I am carelessly now going to end the article abruptly.
All of that being said, we still want to cash in on the viral craze. So, we wrote a follow-up article. A follow-up article is a tool used by bloggers to fill in the billowing white clouds in their sprawling editorial calendars. It is a way to bother online readers and run as many frilly and misdirected ads under their tawdry noses before they scoff away to google about hillbilly trivia or how to boil an egg. Yet it remains a fact that not one reader of this online fad has clicked on a single ad or even once tried to harass the authors. Unfettered by this cruel treatment, we must go on with the article. (The SEO gurus are telling me "we are going to get killed in SEO". I said, "What is SEO, again? Any hints? Should I be worried? Who are you?")
It was known to the best sages that failure is the very best thing that can happen to anyone. Despite this, the average person fails, becomes dejected as well as despondent, becomes addicted to fantastic and wonderful substances, and is later heard losing again with better excuses as part of a new narrative of revisionist denial. Their great-great-grandchildren rarely report an endowment handed down from that side of the family. It remains a critical fact that CIA agents are often handpicked from this category.
The worst sort of person, by far, does not even bother failing, but waits for idle fate to wander in with a last-minute plan for their rock-bottom lives. Those unfortunates in this fringe never learned the lessons of fistory and are doomed to be pummeled. Pulpit jockeys often prop this ideology to gain support from the worst dregs. Their failure in life almost redeems their ordained free-float through life, but not quite.
Finally we arrive at the sweet third spot. The alpha famela, best of all intelligent creatures, fails and is indulged by the experience, is taken to spaces not dreamed of, is never at a loss for words when it comes to explaining how wonderful it is to be defeated by life. These sorts often tour the country giving seminars to pot-belly fanny packers wearing their own names who gobble sound-bites as a way to pass the time and are never out of fungible assets to trade for the meaningless experience. They are happy to sit by the pool and watch. This audience is also, conveniently like a faithful congregation, constantly in need of good advice but incapable of retaining the information. Thoughtless ideas go in their mind-sieve and currency, neatly pressed, rolls out the other side.
Failure never fails. I have personally failed throughout my entire life to fail at all, which may be the most, or least, successful of all failure possibilities. Some would disagree, but they are usually not successful at conveying the message because they are usually in prison from being deemed inappropriate for society by a court of law. The failure here can be applauded only by the judge of record, in the jurisdiction as prescribed.
If someone never failed, then how do they know they even succeeded? In failing to realize the situation, perhaps, they are vindicated but it is only a Pyrrhic victory under the auspices of a Parthian shot clumsily concealed behind Venetian blinds. Winter is upon the gowry and Winning Q. Jealously is its full name. "Fail, love it, and get on with your empty life." should be a bumper sticker tattooed on every Chevy or Ford.
Failure is not in a textbook. One cannot learn to fail. One must be a failure and live the life of a failure and be given over to endless faults before one can ever hope to even begin to understand the basic mainspring coiled within the tenets of ineptitude and failure. Indeed, I have failed to make the point and yet I am carelessly now going to end the article abruptly.
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Now be honest.