Showing posts from April, 2013

Chemtrail Pilots Wanted

Vril to hire 10,000 pilots for chemtrail program; President Obama announces White House worked with Boeing to develope chemtrails that are invisible to the eyes. Phoenix – The Vril Society announced Friday that it is seeking to hire ten thousand pilots in launching its newest push to enslave the world’s population using controversial chemtrails.The revelation came at a private dinner in a secret location believed to be an alien spaceport.Potential candidates are urged to submit a resume and cover letter to before January 15. “We just weren’t using enough gas,” said Green Bishop, a former chairperson of The Rand Corporation during a webinar on Sunday, “adding pilots is like the best thing we can do.Think about it.” 

Bishop went on to say that each plane will be equipped with tons of Sargon gas, pointing out that one milliliter will render a neighborhood helpless and “loopy”.This is noteworthy because some experts say these effects will actually be an i…

War Set to Begin Wednesday

Bangor - The war will begin in Kaesong according to Agent Dennis Rodman who was to speak at a meeting with high brass of the Illuminati just hours ago. The main topic of discussion was the final war.  Rodman was sidelined during a warm-up, having been placed on the injured reserve list. The rebound artist is expected to be healthy next week in time for Washington’s televised face-off with Syria which could decide who has the home-field disadvantage throughout the playoffs. Prime Minister Shinz┼Ź Abe of Japan spoke at a meeting of the Rothschild Foundation Saturday, revealing that he is the person behind the internet hoax that involves typing the number 1 and seeing what happens. He said one evening it just came to him that people would type the number 1 and nothing would happen. However, he had no comment on Pyongyang.
Ida Bitter, a spokesperson for Monsanto, has said that the group would be willing stop developing genetically modified foods if it found that it could no longer prof…

Mysterious Photo Has Locals Baffled

Smack Dab - A photograph was discovered circulating the streets of Smack Dab Monday portraying nine black-robed individuals, four standing and five seated in wooden chairs.  The group members all appeared to be over 50 as they posed in front of a red velvet curtain.  No one is certain exactly who they are.

“They must be very serious people,” said Eli Crooked, a hotdog vendor on the city’s south side, adding, “Each one looks extremely dangerous in his own unique way.”

Six were men, one clinching his fist with a menacing glance, one matter-of-fact, another satisfied, one wearing a big smile, an elderly bald man having trouble holding his head upright, and one standing who seems to be expressing the emotion “can you believe this?” or some mix of shock and indignation.Three were women, two smiling pleasantly and one who looked as if she were not sure where she was or why she was there.This has led some to conclude that the group may have been coerced into sitting for the picture by aquat…