The Chronicles of Granny In The Bed

A herd of cowboy hats in a Cadillac convertible with Bull horns on the hood drive up shooting shotguns in the air, and screaming "whiskey whiskey whiskey!!!" Chug their bottles and throw them violently in the driveway, pissed, shooting the broken glass. "Fuck you goddamn Yankee piece of shit bourbon!" "How do you like me now?" "Not at all." "Everything bigger in this here place." "You know what ain't bigger ?" "Nope.  Couldn't be anything in Texas." "The minds, Harold, the minds." "What a god awful thing to say.  Sumbitch.  Remember the Alamo." "Remember that the earth is more than 6000 years old.  Teach it to your babies, Harry you goddamn lightweight."

Renowned Actor Breaks Fifth Wall Alfred Hitchcock secretly intimated to Raymond Burr, in 1945, before the two met, that the one "last obstacle before the endgame is, and has always been, through the fifth wall."  Rod Serling was more direct, telling Norman Mailer, in an unpublished interview conducted by Jack Rubenstein at a Dallas night club in 1958 that he believed that the fifth wall was something that would never be discovered, but added that was only because it could not be imagined. Occultist Aleister Crowley intimated to Ogden Nash that the only way the one chosen to break the fifth wall could fail was by trying to succeed at it.  Gene Roddenberry and George Lucas have signed a joint statement that is legal and binding.  The main point of the document - that the fifth wall was sacred and unpublishable.  Both agreed that neither of them would break it without notifying the other at least 30 days prior. "It really is this sort of, if you will, seal of t

Front Entry You are standing outside the front of a door.  On a table, nearby, sits a glass of clear liquid upon a golden saucer.   Your lips are parched. >inspect liquid [in glass, after taking glass] Taken The liquid is odorless, colorless, and has a specific weight of 1. Your tongue is dry. >examine saucer There is nothing interesting about the golden saucer. >inventory You are holding, in your hand, a glass containing a clear substance that resembles water.  You are wearing a wristwatch.  Your purse (unopened) contains an unopened envelope and a tiny lady. Your throat feels like sandpaper. >ask lady in the purse about glass of water You don't see the lady in the purse! >open purse Opening your purse reveals, besides the ordinary fare, an unopened envelope and a tiny lady. "What do you want now?!" Screams the lady, "you're letting the cold air in." Your starting to dehydrate