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Showing posts from April, 2016

All Dem Capers

All Dem Capers
Based on the novel by Frothy Grilban
Choreography by Umpher Rym

A newly divorced breeder and door-to-door salesman, Merleandor Comrade (Yelly Scroban), meets up with former furniture repairman and lawnmower collector Fonzi Carmichael (Freelance Chewbaka) who has recently been diagnosed with outer depressive disorder.  Outer depressive disorder is a mental anomaly and antithesis that causes anyone who meets Carmichael to become clinically and morbidly depressed soon after.  The two begin running a letters racket, based off the numbers racket.  They replace the numbers with letters and call it simply “the letters”.

When Chives Kandalabrah (Shelly Vim) goes up against hot boxer Go Brillowitz (Lomp Cockstern) in a battle to see who would get in line first on Black Friday to purchase a robot that roves the ceiling in search of dust bunnies known as “the trainspotter” for €89.999, their plans are thwarted when newcomer optometrists in overcoats Walter and Gideon Reyjvak (play…

Moratorium For The Boratorium

Moratorium For The Boratorium Written and Directed by Phil Therschaut
In 1620's Tora Bora, when 99½-year-old cow poacher Sarik Bengabariq (Slando Phonbhot) is politely asked by well-meaning townspeople (Jerstand Box, Calandra Sue Yimbifity, and Borstap Conway) to leave town because he is too messy, all hell breaks loose after local sitar player Vikota Al-fazad (Margery Hathaway-Bonkers) later accuses Sarik of shaming her favorite horn and antler importer Schlepper Schmendrick (Santana Fortytrees) in a bar fight that lasts most of a Tuesday evening, over a counter top made of Argentinian bullhorn.

Meanwhile, the town is suffering a crisis.  Everywhere, people are playing the apple gourd, a hollowed out percussive instrument that has become such a nuisance, local cattle are slowly drowning themselves.

At a vote of the Tora Bora City Council, led by Mayor Dux Qirebirk (Manny Del Vecio), it is determined that apple gourds are not a proper instrument for cosmopolitan city dwellers and…

Ardently Grappling Schnorvil

Ardently Grappling Schnorvil
Directed by Matilda Bagpipes

After fourth chair violinist Schnorvil McBetrest (Frans Pasckenheist) is thrown out of the New York Philharmonic Orchestra by new conductor Sargent Paul Varnish (April Langswell) for knocking over child prodigy Bogues Henry (Gird Villanova) with his violin case, Schnorvil is led on a series of misadventures through the Australian outback, many of which involve drugs and include multiple atrocities involving innocent aborigines (played by Shil Berham, Angalina Staplegun, Gori Bash, Trilamp Garland, and Milzi Pympe-Deville), before returning to New York with a fresh attitude and vicious playing style that rivals the very best musicians the world has ever seen.  Many who hear Schnorvil play at this time fall into a trance and weep begging for more.

That is when Schnorvil meets Watusi Endeavors (Marilyn Streece), a key agent for Shalango Middle Class Records.  She offers Schnorvil top billing at Club Get Down, a local fop night spo…

50 New Fart Rules (and other devolutions)

1.     Whoever is without praising is the one who is hiding its raising.
2.     She who shit her purse is the one whose wind has cursed.
3.     The man who looked innocent threw a terd not finished yet.
4.     The doctor who denied it is the one whose sphincter invited it.
5.     The teacher who's acting mean is the one who's made the room unclean.
6.     The policeman who reads its rights is the one who flew the brownie's kites.
7.     Whomever tries to act not responsible is, in fact, the one who is probably did it.
8.     One will fart and pretend not to have done so, often.
9.     Whoever broke the wind is in trouble, its a sin.
10.   Try not to do that often, or your marble balls will soften.
11.   It is never socially acceptable to expel flatulence on a gathering of people.
12.   There is no situation in which that is okay.
13.   Break not that unless you're going to bat.
14.   Believe me now, for I speak wise, the one who farts very often lies.
15.   Yet, consi…