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How To Blog


Granny’s 14 Points

Steps to Success




  1. If you want to blog, you should definitely blog.
  2. Remember that everyone wants to hear what you have to say.
  3. Pick a topic that will sell any style of shoe. 
  4. Write crazy and dangerous things.  It is also good advice to violate key rules of grammar and punctuation. 
  5. Create buzz by visiting your blog from public computers all over town, being sure to click on the ads.  Experts say that clicks count.  Also, leave anonymous comments like: “this is the greatest blog EVER.”
  6. Share your blog with facebook friends and guilt them into liking it.
  7. Get plenty of exercise.
  8. Brag about your blog at any reunion.
  9. Create a religious cult and a facebook group with links to your blog.
  10. If you don’t know how to write, copy text (and photos) from other sites and paste them onto yours (ctrl+c to copy, ctrl+v to paste,).
  11. Keywords are words used by search engines to categorize your blog.  You only need one keyword: bigtime.
  12. Post a manifesto on your blog and stage a non-violent coup.  Post a video of the coup and include a link to the manifesto.  Relinquish control back to the original regime in stages, meeting timetables and guidelines. 
  13. Rewrite history the way you think it should have happened from a strange perspective.
  14. Advertise in the neighborhood weekly.
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